A number of authors have written books applying the wisdom
of the Rule of Saint Benedict to ordinary daily life. If you’re interested in
reading a book like that, I suggest you do a search on amazon.com or another
on-line bookseller and you’ll find plenty of leads.
I chose to comment on the 4th step of humility
because it describes the only healthy way to deal with difficult or painful
circumstances.
Again, the passage: “The fourth step of humility is that in
this obedience under difficult, unfavorable, or even unjust conditions, his
heart quietly embraces suffering and endures it without weakening or seeking escape”
(RB 7:35-36)
This isn’t an option reserved for monks. It describes what
must take place for anyone if there is to be any resolution or peace of mind.
The alternatives are toxic and dangerous. When faced with suffering, the way
that leads to peace leads through the suffering, not around it. That is
why we hold before us the image of Christ on the crucifix. In essence, as we
embrace the suffering and allow ourselves to experience it deeply, he takes the
suffering to himself and embraces us with his arms extended on the cross. The
alternatives: anger, fighting, revenge, resentments, attempts to manipulate to
triumph over the pain.
In meditation, sit calmly, focus your attention on your
breathing, and allow the feelings to arise and wash over you. Pay particular attention
to any body sensations that are associated with the pain, and allow yourself to
experience them fully. It may take time, but you will get to a place of peace.
And once you’ve reached that place, you will be better equipped to deal with
whatever is facing you.
Try this with small matters; it’s good practice for when the
big ones come along.
But once again, I warn you: be very aware of the tendency to
form resentments, because they can rot the soul. Ask God to help remove them
from your heart and to free you from their effects.
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