St. Ignatius' life-changing discovery

One day, while St. Ignatius of Loyola was convalescing from a serious wound he received in a battle, he realized something that changed the direction of his life. He realized that whenever he read or thought about worldly matters (such as knights in battle), he took pleasure in it but afterwards he was left feeling empty and even a bit sad. On the other hand, when he read the Gospels and the lives of the saints and thought about such things, he also took pleasure in it, and afterwards he continued to have an experience of abiding joy.

What pleasures leave us feeling empty or dissipated? What pleasures do we have that fill us with joy, a joy that remains with us for a long time to come? What changes or adjustments might we want to consider? Saint Ignatius, pray for us.

When you don't get what you pray for

There are times when we pray for something but God does not answer our prayers the way we hoped he would; sometimes, in fact, we end up getting the opposite of what we prayed for. “I’ve prayed for X but I’m getting Y. Doesn’t he care?”

Well, he does care, more than you know. He knows what you don’t know, that’s why he doesn’t always answer your prayers according to your own wishes. Don’t forget that we pray “Thy will be done,” not “My will be done.”

As it says in Self-Abandonment to Divine Providence, “. . . He knows that you do not know what is good for you and he makes it His business to give it to you. He does not mind disappointing you. You thought you were going eastwards, he takes you to the west. You were on the point of striking something dangerous, he turns the rudder and brings you safe to port.” (Book II, Chp. 1, #8)

Find your peace in those words.

A simple prayer of consecration

“Lord, I wish to give myself to you, even though my flesh is weak at times. Take me Lord, lead me where you would have me go, teach me what You would have me learn, heal within me what You know is time to be healed. Take me, Lord, but assure me that You are with me. Even in the midst of doubt and confusion, even when clouds cover the sun, show me that You are there, let me hear Your Father’s voice, let me sense Your glory.”

Dealing with Hurt, part two

Consider just one situation that happened to you in the past, a situation which has made you feel sorry for yourself, or blame others: Could it be that your own sin, or misdoing, or mistake, or blindness, or ignorance, or something else within you may have contributed as much to the situation--or maybe even more, than those you are upset with? What will it cost you to admit that? What might you gain---perhaps not paradise itself, be certainly the possibility of some peace of mind…perhaps even a solution or a way to heal the hurt? Maybe a way to reach forgiveness?

Dealing with Hurt

Someone hurt me a long time ago and is still on my mind. Then I decided to look at the hurt as a wound I am carrying. In my meditation, I gazed upon the wound and allowed myself to feel the pain without thinking about what had happened. I focused simply on the wound. And then I held it up before the wounded Christ and let his blood flow into my wound.

Try it some time when you are wounded. Find out what happens.

A second poem about grace

Gifts come to us everyday unbidden. 

Some we embrace

                some slip through us: we deemed them insignificant

                                                                                though they may have changed our lives.

Some have impact

                while others are unwelcomed.

Some are fragile

                and we crush them in our haste.

Some are just what we need

                but we expected them to come

                                from another direction, so we ignore them.

How do we learn             

                to pay more attention?

How do we learn to expect?

Can we become more receptive?

A prose poem about Grace

Not all gifts

                have to be earned,

                                                deserved,

                                                                merited.

Your very life wasn’t.

                Nor was that love you found

                                on a day you felt unloved.

It’s called grace.

                God gives it lavishly.

                                Do you walk around with a basket big enough

                                                                to catch it all?

                                                or are you the type

                                                                to settle for

                                                                                a crumb

                                                                                     or nothing at all?

(c) 2014 by Bede Camera, O.S.B.

Made in God's image, continued

Encouraging words from Cistercian monk Fr. Thomas Keating, writing about “the affirmation of our basic goodness:”

“In Christian terms it is the fact that we are created in the image of God, and this goodness can never be lost by any amount of misbehavior. It is always there. It is God’s permanent gift to us. Even if it covered over by layers of psychological damage and misbehavior, it can always revive. You just have to give it the chance to express itself by reducing the obstacles.”  (Divine Therapy and Addiction, p. 105)

And what are the obstacles within you? In prayer, ask the Lord to help you become aware of them, and, when you are aware, then ask him to help you clear them away.

Creativity: Part One

We are creations of a Creator God. We are created in his image, and that puts before us a wondrous and mysterious destiny. As Pope Francis has said, we are meant to be  “more human than human.”

God is the Great Creator, and, made in his image, we too are meant to be creators in our world. Each of us. Our creativity, then, is a gift from God and part of our destiny and part of our responsibiity.

Focus a bit not on the great Creativity of the magnificent artists, writers, composers and thinkers of our civilization; instead, focus on the small creative acts that we perform, each in our own way, in the day-to-day world. Focus on the flower arrangements, the scapbooks, decorating a child’s room, making a delicious meal, sending a loving note or email to an old friend, writing a reflection, finding a solution to a long-standing problem: all of these are acts of our ordinary creativity. What is part of yours? Think on that.

To summarize: When we exercise our creativity, we are exercising what it means to be made in the image of God. God is there with us, in the creative act, even when we are not aware of it. When we are creative, we are working in partnership with God, who inspires us, gifts us, guides us, sustains us, takes delight that his creativity is being extended in the world in the here and now.

Finally, think of this: when we exercise our creativity, we are tapping into the most wonderful parts of our own being. That is why the act of creating is so often an occasion of peace and of joy for us.

Positive Thoughts can help

The invitation to prayer we considered yesterday began with the words “come away,” and that is the basis for this reflection.

What do we need to “come away” from?  Often we need to leave behind distressing, dark or troubling thoughts, traces of bitterness and resentment, or perhaps those little episodes which run through our minds again and again no matter how much we try to stop it from happening.

The Scriptures offer a remedy by directing our thoughts to what is positive and healing, healthy and holy. Consider Philippians 4:8-9.

“. . . whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things . . . and the God of peace will be with you.”

When we spend time meditating on these things, we develop healthy connections in the brain. The more we think on these things, the stronger the connections become. Eventually we can develop the ability to turn our attention away from what troubles us and find relief in the positive connections we have developed. (See “Buddha’s Brain”)

A divine invitation

“Come away to a quiet place and rest a while.”

--said Jesus to his apostles in the Gospel for Sunday 16B.

I suggest you consider this as an invitation to prayer.  

“Come away, “ he says. Leave your activities, your thoughts about your life, your concerns, your issues and your preoccupations behind, even if only for “a while.” Give yourself a time to rest, maybe for the length of just a few deep breaths where you focus on nothing other than your breathing. If you can take longer, so much the better, but take what you can. And if there is noise around you and you have trouble getting to “a quiet place,” breathe more deeply and move deep down inside where there is calm and silence beneath all the noise.

Getting away, quiet, and restful times. These three are not luxuries, they are necessities for us. What might happen to your spirit if you were to give them a greater priority? How much more good will you be able to do for others if you take the time you need to refresh your batteries? Now,  before you leave this page, close your eyes and take three deep breaths. And then go back into the fray.

New song lyrics

I’ve written a new song. It’s a solo meant to be sung as a communion meditation. One of my former students is going to sing it for the first time at a Mass in August. Hopefully, I’ll be able to get it posted to YouTube. I’m going to give you the text here, and would suggest that you use it as a post-communion prayer yourself. If you can, let me know how it works for you. Many thanks. The name of the song is “Make Me Yours” and the music and text are copyright © 2015, Bede Camera O.S.B. and Saint Anselm Abbey.

I come to you O Lord this day, as on so many days before.

I bring to you my joys and sorrows, with faith and with hope.

Send me, O Lord, your grace this day, the grace I need to follow you.

I know, O Lord, that you are with me when I call to you.

You feed me, you strengthen me, you heal me.

You give to me your very flesh and blood—

you dwell with me and I find myself in you, O Lord.

Touch my soul, O Lord, as you know how I need.

Give me your mercy and your grace.

Make me new this day, O Lord this day,

Make me yours, O Lord, I pray,

now and forever, O Lord,

today, O Lord.

Prayer without words

A 90-year-old man used to come into the church every day and sit before the tabernacle for three hours. One day, as he was leaving, the Pastor asked him what prayers he said when he was sitting there. “Oh, I don’t use words,” he replied. “I sit there with him, and he is there with me, and that’s enough.”

Think of a couple who have reached a point in their relationship where they are able to simply be with one another without speaking, who are fulfilled just by being together. Can you pray like that?

Evagrius of Pontus (4^th century) said this about prayer: “When your intellect, in an ardent love for God, sets itself gradually to transcend, so to speak, created things and rejects all thinking . . . at the same time filling itself with gratitude and joy, then you may consider yourself approaching the borders of prayer.”

Meditation in times of trouble

In times of adversity, turmoil, temptation, anxiety or any other distress, pray these lines from Psalm 57:

“Have mercy on me, God, have mercy

for in you my soul has taken refuge.

In the shadow of your wings I take refuge

till the storms of destruction pass by.” 

Use these words as the basis for meditation. Don’t think about the issue that is troubling you; instead take several deep breaths and dive deep beneath the turmoil and feel yourself resting in God’s embrace. Stay there as long as you like; return there often, as many times as you need to. Picture your personal storms whirling around while you are safe and secure and protected.

Examine your reactions

Pay attention to those situations in your life where you react by doing, thinking or feeling something automatically, as if you were programmed like one of Pavlov’s dogs.

When A happens, then I do (think, feel) B.

No reflection, no deliberate thought, no conscious choice.

If you could catch one of those situations and take the time to examine your reaction or mode of reacting closely, you might discover that you now have a choice whether or not to respond in your habitual way or perhaps to re-examine or re-evaluate what has until this point been an unreflective habit.

Questions you might ask yourself: Is this way of reacting appropriate for me at this particular stage of my life or my growth and development? What are the usual consequences to this type of reaction? What happens if I evaluate my reaction in terms of the challenges in yesterday’s reflection? What happens if I bring it to prayer?

You might find yourself living with more freedom, more peace of mind and less angst and turmoil.

It’s worth a try, no?

3 challenges

Three challenges for you today. These are all things I came across in my morning “lectio divina.”

1. “Those who refuse to take up the Cross – who refuse to sacrifice themselves for the sake of the kingdom—will not find peace.” (Nick Wagner)

2. “Take a look at your heart. Everything you see in it that might sadden God, remove.” St. Augustine

3. “Be the door-keeper of your heart and do not let any thought come in without questioning it. Question each thought individually: ‘Are you on our side or the side of our foes?’ And if it is one of ours, it will fill you with tranquility.”  (Evagrius of Pontus)

Solitude and isolation

Solitude and isolation

Solitude is a necessity; isolation is a trap. Solitude is life-giving; isolation is life-taking. One generally seeks solitude in order to be refreshed for subsequent service; a person in isolation has no one left to serve. Solitude builds up the spirit and soul; isolation eats away and weakens what little is left.

Jesus frequently sought solitude in order to pray to his Father, and to prepare for the needs of the people he looked upon “like sheep without a shepherd.” Judas, on the other hand, lived an isolated life; I cannot imagine that he ever really became part of the group of apostles, especially when they were relaxing together. I picture him off in a corner brooding and petulant.

Solitude makes one more sensitive to the needs of others (see “The Joy of the Gospel,” paragraph 9; isolation hardens the heart. “Life grows by being given away, and it weakens in isolation and comfort” (the South American and Caribbean bishops, quoted in “The Joy of the Gospel,” paragraph 10.)

I was standing around with some other monks today after Mass, enjoying a cup of coffee. Finally, I slipped away to go to my room to read and pray and think about these reflections. The solitude I sought helped me have something to offer to others. If I had been isolating myself, there would be nothing to offer, and I would feel far less alive than I have throughout this day.

In short, solitude is a source of blessing. Isolation sources nothing. Choose wisely.

It will be given to you

Early this morning I began wondering what to write about today, when suddenly two Latin words came into my mind: “Dabitur vobis,” meaning, “It will be given to you.”

That’s what Jesus told his apostles. They were going to be arrested and brought before governors and kings to be questioned. He told them not to worry about what to say; it would be given to them at the proper time. This is recorded in Matthew 10:19 (and also in Mark 13 and Luke 21.)

I’ve thought of those words many times over the years, always at times when I wasn’t sure what I was going to say or write in any particular situation. And, always, some inspiration came to me at just the proper time. Has this ever happened to you?

And so, I went to my room and did some reading and praying, and a topic formed in my mind, one that I’m going to save for tomorrow and maybe even the day after that.

But here’s a question for you to consider when and if you have a few moments to yourself: What is the difference between solitude and isolation? More about that next time.

Joy after Sorrow

Good Friday leads to Easter Sunday.

Death leads to Resurrection.

 

This cycle is repeated throughout our lives, beginning with Baptism where we are baptized into Christ’s death so that we may rise with him in Resurrection.

 

Look at your life and see whether or not this is true. Have you suffered “little deaths” along the way that led to a new life for you? Have you found, as I have found, that there is often a divine “gift” buried inside so many of our losses and disappointments, our failures and even our tragedies? I know this to be true not because I read it or someone told it to me; I know it because my experience has showed me time and time again just how true it is.

 

This is what Olivier Clément has to say: “The baptismal sequence of death and resurrection is repeated throughout our pilgrimage . . . When everything seems lost, baptismal grace, if we pay heed to it, can convert a situation of death into one of resurrection, an apparent deadlock into a necessary breakthrough.” (The Roots of Christian Mysticism, p. 106)

 

Sometimes it takes the passage of time and a good deal of patience to experience the completion of the process. It also takes faith and hope. Pray for an increase of these in your spirit.

Looking Back

Looking back

There are two ways of looking back: one is life-giving while the other is toxic and potentially  self-destructive.

When we look back to “remember” what God has done for us and how he has acted in our lives, we strengthen our faith and hope that God will continue to be with us in the present and the future.

However, there are times when we are being called to move on, when we are being led by God-blessed invitations, calls and inspirations. At times like these, we may be tempted to look back and lament what we have lost, to regret what no longer is, or even to recall pleasures from “the old life.” Thoughts like these impede our motion forward, bog us down in thoughts and can make us miserable, or resentful, or resistant to God’s constant call to move forward, to travel on ground we have not traveled before. The take us out of the “now” and lead to no future.

Two examples from the Holy Scriptures:

---Lot’s wife looked back and was turned into a pillar of salt (Genesis 19:26). I’ve often wondered about the significance of the pillar of salt. Sr. Genevieve Glen suggests that while looking back, Lot’s wife kept crying tears of salt, and the salt eventually overcame her. That’s a pretty good explanation, I dare say.

---Jesus taught that “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the Kingdom of God.” (Luke 9:62)

What kind of “looking back” might you want to avoid?

Going beyond ourselves

Going Beyond Ourselves

Last time I suggested that our ultimate destiny is to evolve beyond our limitations, failures and weaknesses because we are made in God’s image. In other words, we go beyond what it is we understand to be human.

Well, then, just this morning, I read something Pope Francis said that gets to the heart of what I’ve been trying to say:

“Thanks solely to this encounter—or renewed encounter—with God’s love, . . . we become fully human when we become more than human, when we let God bring us beyond ourselves in order to attain the fullest truth of our being.”  (“The joy of the Gospel,” paragraph 8)

United with God’s love, we become more than ourselves. Perhaps you’ve had a small taste of this reality even for the briefest of moments.

Made in God's Image

This reflection might be hard to understand at first, but if you stick with it, it will be worth the effort. We’ll begin with basic Biblical truth: We are made in God’s image. (Genesis 1.27)

But what does that mean? Can we fully understand it? I don’t think we can, because we can’t fully understand God. If we are made in his image, then there is a part of ourselves far beyond what we can grasp: something so much greater, and magnificent, and mind-blowing, and, let’s not forget:  immortal.

Practical application: Although we need to aware of and accept our limitations and weaknesses, we don’t ever to be discouraged: our destiny will take us far beyond our limitations, and our weaknesses, and our failures, and our sins. Too good to be true? Well, we don’t even have to understand how this is meant to happen. That is God’s work. That is the work of God’s grace--over the course of our lifetimes and even beyond.

Listen to Saint John:  “Beloved, we are God’s children now; it does not yet appear what we shall be, but we know that when [the Savior] appears, we shall be like him.” (1 John 3.2)

Next time we’ll take a look at what Pope Francis has to say about the matter.

Who are we in God's eyes?

Who are we in God’s eyes?

My sense of who I am in God’s eyes is being simplified as I settle into retirement. It is being stripped of things which I once thought were so important: productivity, accomplishment, projects, plans, hopes and dreams, or what I am “worth” in the eyes of others.

Actually I’m getting closer to the truth of things during this process, a truth which has always been there but which had been hidden beneath all the stuff which doesn’t matter so much any more.

 I must confess, however, that part of me is hoping that I will be led to doing something wonderful, so it’s obvious that the process of purification is only just beginning. And even if I do end up doing something wonderful, that will not make me appear any bigger, more important, more perfect or more loveable in God’s eyes. I already have that all, and so do you. More about this next time.

“You will guide my by your counsel,

and so you will lead me to glory.”

(Psalm 73)

How does that counsel come to us? The ways are countless. Since God is in everything, it follows that God can use everything in his never-ending process of guiding and leading us. 

The problem is that we can often miss his counsel because we don’t recognize it for what it is. In fact, there are times when we might outright reject his counsel because we don’t approve of the way it comes to us. Be careful. Be open. Tune your receiver to a broader bandwidth. Be especially on the lookout for the unexpected, the unorthodox, and for anything that arouses a great deal of resistance in us. So often we fight the word that leads to life.  

But just remember that, as Jesus has shown us so dramatically, sometimes the path that leads to glory leads through some pretty rough terrain at first. Just ask John the Baptist, whose feast we celebrate today. And by all means, keep in mind all the Christians in the world who are being beheaded now in 2015 for what they believe. May they reign in glory.

 

 

I will lead the blind.

“I will lead the blind on their journey.

By paths unknown I will guide them.”

(Isaiah 42)

A few months ago I was praying for things to turn out a certain way. Well, they didn’t. And so, once again, like so many other times in my life, I am walking on ground I have not walked on before. Just like Abraham, and Moses, and the Blessed Mother, and the apostles, and so many of the saints, and in the lives of countless ordinary people who have been led in directions they never would have planned for or predicted or perhaps even wanted.

It is sacred ground we are traveling. As I’ve said so many times before, it is simply our task to keep going and to bow before the mystery, and, above all, to place our trust in the One who alone is worthy of all our trust.

May the Lord continue to guide you.

A small act of love

A small act of love:

The rest area (Exit 10, Mass Pike) was chaotic. Crowds of folk, long lines, hustle and bustle everywhere, people looking shell-shocked, teenaged girls especially  moody. One mother keeping guard over a table while the family went to get food. She had a stack of recycled napkins and was setting the table, using the opened napkins as placemats, one for each of her family, all ready and waiting for them to return. In the midst of all the hecticity, she created a small island of domesticity.

The JOy of the Gospel, part one

I’ve committed myself to a slow, prayerful re-reading of The Joy of the Gospel, the apostolic exhortation published by Pope Francis on November 24, 2013. It is a beautiful document, both reflective and practical, filled with wisdom, joy and love. I’m not going to undertake a commentary here; the document is more eloquent than anything I could write myself. Here are some excerpts from just the first three paragraphs, followed by a couple of questions I offer for consideration.  Perhaps you’ll be inspired to read (or re-read) the document yourself. Here goes:

“Those who [encounter Jesus] are set free from sin, sorrow, inner emptiness and loneliness.”

A brief prayer: ‘Lord, I have let myself be deceived; in a thousand ways I have shunned your love, yet here I am once more, to renew my covenant with you. I need you. Save me once again, Lord, take me once more into your redeeming embrace.’

The effects of consumerism in today’s world: “the desolation and anguish born of a complacent yet covetous heart, the feverish pursuit of frivolous pleasures, and a blunted conscience.”

“God never tires of forgiving us; we are the ones who tire of seeking his mercy.”

My questions:

                1. Have you ever asked to be set free from “sin, sorrow, emptiness and loneliness”?

                2. What is the difference between pleasure and joy?

                3. Can you recall and times in your life where your pursuit of pleasure has actually caused pain in your life?

                4. Do you think God would give up on you if you have to ask for forgiveness too often?

More about this in another reflection some day.